I don’t “I Do.” Do I?

Marriage. In short, I never believed in it. I thought it was a pointless and unnecessary idea because who really wants to spend thousands of dollars to show that you’re committed to someone? Isn’t a verbal commitment enough? Are you really that insecure that you need to make a huge show of your relationship just to get a signed document stating that your significant other “belongs” to you? By now, all those people you would want at your wedding and witness your removal from the single life probably know you’re in love…at least I would hope so.

Anyway, that’s what I’ve always thought. But for some reason about a year ago (okay there is a reason, but that’s a story for another time), the idea of marriage stopped seeming so purposeless and started to have some meaning to it. As a girl, if a guy loves you, you want him to show it, right? You want to have a symbolic meaning behind your relationship. You want a title that stands for something more; rather than just telling people, “Yeah, he’s my boyfriend.” What’s so wrong with that?

Since birth, girls are brainwashed with the idea of a Prince Charming and a perfect ending. We watched (and most likely still continue to watch) countless numbers of Disney movies that portray a romantic love story. Yet, we tend to ignore all the obstacles that stand in the way of that love. We happily overlook the malevolent queens, the fire-breathing dragons, the evil sorcerers and even the wicked stepmothers who take up over half the movie. No, we only notice the man that sweeps the woman off her feet; and we only remember the happy ending. Therefore, as we grow up we prepare ourselves for our Prince Charming and use Pinterest to plan that special day. However, we neglect reality and forget to prepare ourselves for the heartache and trying moments that test our strength. When those moments occur, we all too often complain about why the guy can’t be ‘like this’ or be ‘like that,’ or why couldn’t he just say ‘this’ instead of saying ‘that.’ We expect our man to be like Prince Charming; tall, dark, handsome and with zero faults. It’s an extreme wake-up call once we realize that could never happen.

In my opinion, before one starts dreaming up their fairytale wedding, they first need to step out of their dreamland and face reality. It is essential to understand that just because a person isn’t perfect, doesn’t mean a relationship can’t be. Take the faults as they come and have faith, and come to terms with the fact that no one could ever be perfect; but that doesn’t mean that they can’t be your own flawless Prince Charming.

So, in the midst of my hypocrisy, I started to understand why the idea of marriage seemed so appealing. If you can make it to the point of marriage in a healthy and loving relationship despite all the ups and downs, it really is a happily ever after, isn’t it?


Above photo Courtesy: www.bubblews.com

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